Owen's Birth Story

As hard as it is for me to believe, this little fella will be a year old tomorrow!  In commemoration of his (almost) birthday, I'm sharing with you today the story of his labor and arrival.  (Before you read any further, please take a moment to read this.  It is a necessary preface to Owen's birth story.)

If "birth stories" really aren't your thing, here's the summary: I had a fast labor that resulted in a big baby who has changed our lives forever.

For those of you with a little more time and interest, here you go:

September 16, 2012 was a Sunday.  I was extremely pregnant.  (A week past my due date according to the doctor; two weeks past according to my calculations.)  As I mentioned previously, I had become a bit of a recluse by this point in the process.  I wasn't sleeping well due to heartburn, a baby on my bladder, and general 41-weeks-pregnant-discomfort.  I had been up earlier that morning, but had gone back to bed for a few hours.  At around 11:00 a.m., I crawled out of bed to start the day and was suddenly very suspicious that my water had broken.  Josh was in the kitchen, and I remember saying to him, "Um...it's possible that my water just broke."

He recommended a call to my doula, who agreed that it was a strong possibility.  We decided to give it a few hours to see if I continued to leak amniotic fluid and/or whether contractions started.  The former happened and the latter did not.  I became increasingly convinced that my water was broken, but was concerned that I didn't seem to be "in labor".

A passionate conversation ensued between me and Josh regarding whether or not we should go to the hospital.  I wanted to stay home as long as possible, knowing that once I arrived at the hospital with "ruptured membranes" (broken water) I would be "on the clock" to have the baby in 24 hours.  

(Perhaps this wouldn't have been as much a concern in "normal" circumstances, but if you know me well, you know that "normal" and my health rarely go together.  Because of an autoimmune condition I have that causes my blood pressure to typically be low and unstable, I was told by my cardiologist early in my pregnancy that an epidural would not be an option for me during labor.  Thankfully, I had several months to prepare myself for a natural delivery.  

I resisted going to the hospital with ruptured membranes but not having contractions because I was afraid they would induce me.  Inductions tend to be cause much stronger contractions than a natural labor would, which is why women who are induced very frequently ask for an epidural... which wasn't an option for me... hence my resistance to going to the hospital.)

Josh is definitely the more cautious one in our marriage, so the thought of just hanging around our apartment knowing that the arrival of our child was imminent was utterly absurd to him.  By 3:00 p.m. we had compromised that we would drive near the hospital, but not to it.  

Our final moment at home before Owen's arrival

(In NYC, particularly Manhattan, private rooms in a hospital are very expensive and rarely available.  A woman would deliver her baby in a {private, of course} delivery room, then be transferred to a shared room in the maternity ward {2 to a room for C-sections, 4 to a room for vaginal delivery}.  This also means that spouses aren't allowed to stay the night, but are considered "visitors" who can only be present during specified hours.

I know, I know... hospitals aren't hotels; this is how our mothers and grandmothers gave birth and recovered; conditions are far worse in other parts of the world.... I know.  But I'm grateful that I had another option, and I took it without hesitation.  Because we still owned a car at that time, I chose a hospital out of the city on Long Island, which had just opened a brand new Women's Center a few months prior with all private rooms!  Without a doubt, one of the best decisions I ever made.  They were amazing, for more reasons than I can detail here.  But seriously, if you're in NYC and pregnant, I highly recommend Long Island Jewish Hospital.)

So we drove out of the city to a park right beside the hospital, and I began walking laps in an attempt to bring on contractions.  I even tried to run "stadiums" on the steps to the kiddie slide until I smacked my head on the bar at the top, and Josh told me to stick to laps and lunges.

It began to get dark, I wasn't having any consistent or strong contractions, and we were hungry.  We again compromised that we would go to the hospital, but not up to the fourth floor to be admitted.  So we grabbed some dinner in the food court, Josh sat in the lobby and worked on his computer, and I walked laps around him.  The hospital security guards and concierge were amused, but I reassured myself that they had certainly witnessed similar scenarios before.

By 10:00 p.m., I was tired but not in labor.  We decided to head up to the Labor and Delivery floor, hoping to at least rest before the doctors tried to intervene.  Our hopes were granted!  The doctor confirmed that my water had indeed broken.  The monitor showed I was contracting, but not strong enough that I could feel it.  So we were ushered to a room, made comfortable in our beds, and told to try to get some sleep.  No one ever said anything to us about induction, Pitocin, or a 24-hour window.  I'm so grateful for that!  The resident who confirmed my water was broken came back in after reading my chart to say, "Um... you do know that you can't have an epidural, right?" Ha!  Yes, I know, and thank you for being sure I knew.  What a surprise that would have been!

We did receive a visit from the nurse anesthetist who informed me that the anesthesiologist for that evening had read my chart and was unwilling to administer spinal anesthesia under any circumstance.  While we knew it wasn't an option for my labor, we had also been told by the cardiologist that a spinal block would be acceptable in the event I needed a C-section.  (If my blood pressure dipped a little then, it would be alright since I wouldn't be trying to push a baby out.)  But this nurse was telling us that this particular doctor didn't think that was wise, meaning I would need to be put under general anesthesia, meaning Josh would not be allowed in the operating room, meaning neither of us would witness the birth of our son.

To type that all out now brings tears to my eyes, but in the moment I was able to remain calm about the situation.  I remember thinking, "Well, it's after 11:00 now.  Shift change is at 7:00 a.m., and my cardiologist's office opens at 8:00.  If I need a C-section, it won't be until after shift change.  Maybe the new anesthesiologist will be okay with a spinal block.  Or I can just call the cardiologist to talk to him."

So I told Josh that we should get some sleep while we could, and we both nodded off....

{Well, this has gotten lengthier than I imagined.  I'll post the conclusion tomorrow!}